In The Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Reflecting on life is something that I love to do quiet often because I enjoy seeing how I have grownas an individual and servant to Allah. As I was working and looking at different books I found myself constantly re-examining some of the books I read when I first began to seriously read and learn about Islam. It is interesting how we tend to fight against something only to fully accept in the end. I did this when it came to reading the Quran.
I was a Christian, a well versed Christian, but also a truth seeker who was not afraid to study other scriptures with a closed made up mind. I remember I asked a Muslim friend of mine to read his Quran, he agreed, and when I received it the first thing I did was open it to see what it had to say about Jesus (as). Now mind you, I never did believe in the trinity nor did I ever believe Jesus (as) was God/Allah. I did, however, believe he was the son of God/Allah (authu billah). When I seen that the Quran rejected the idea that Jesus (as) was the son of God/Allah I concluded that Islam and Muslims did not respect Jesus (as) and they new nothing. Now I have to say the information I read was not the Quran or the translation of the Quran.This information I read was in the back of the Quran where they would write about Muslim belief. Either way I got rid of the Quran quick. I gave it back to my friend without giving this Holy book a real opportunity to correct my thinking. How close minded I was.
I opened the Quran a few more times approaching it in the same manner, very foolishly.
This irresponsible way of reading the Quran changed the day I got fed up while talking to other Christians. I vividly remember how frustrated and angry I felt when quoting the bible to prove there was no such thing as the trinity, but of course my words fell upon def ears. They were like me, close minded and unable to see the truth. I no longer wanted to associate myself with Christianity. The division was great and the belief system was flawed. I couldn’t understand the double talk in the bible either so I decided to completely separate myself from Christianity. I began searching through Buddhism and the only thing I liked about it was the meditation and the reality of presence that it teaches. I couldn’t stay a Buddhist because they either did not fully acknowledge Allah or they completely denied him. But, what killed it the most for me was when they would bow and the statue was in front of them on the table. I had to keep searching.
Reluctantly, I went back to my friend and asked for the Quran.This was the fourth or fifth time I touched the Quran at an attempt to read it. Little did I know this was the time Allah had set aside for me to explore His carefully constructed words. I laid on my bed in the middle of the afternoon and was shocked, surprised, taken aback. My heart was on fire with tears in my eyes. I heard my self several times saying yes yes. This book that I did not give a proper chance had me excited for the first time as it continued to tell me that Allah is One. There is no god except Allah. Constantly reminding me of what I always new to be true. Oh! And on top of that this book denounced the trinity completely and plainly. I knew then I was going to be a Muslim. I still believed Jesus (as) was the son of Allah (may Allah forgive me), but everything else in this book I agreed on. I was so happy to see that this book did not make all the Prophets major sinners like the bible did and I love how it cleared Jesus from all things that was improperly attributed to him.
It did not take me long to read the entire English Quran or the history of Islam. I did this in 2 weeks. I spent another week asking questions and refusing to allow others influence my thinking when it came to this new religion. I read these books with a prayerful attitude after Allah humbled me and guided me to the exact thing I had refused to be apart of. This book is true to it’s word when it says it is a light and a guidance. It absolutely touches every aspect of life whether individual, mankind as a whole, or society. My favorite Quran is the one posted above because it offers English, transliteration, and Arabic. I use this Quran to memorize. I love this book and I pray Allah continues to help me understand it and be guided by it. I pray Allah guides those who also are seeking as I was. I pray Allah increase us all in knowledge in which is beneficial to drawing close to Him as individuals and as an Ummah. Ameen